XLVI – Best Of “Year 0”

LiFe TiDeS is 1 year old tomorrow.

Like a band compiling a Best Of after having released a single album, I chose to gather a few of my favourite tunes.

Anyway, it’s been 365 days. What have you been up to?

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Hers

Stumbling Into It:

I decided to Google: “not buying anything for a year”. I thought this could be the way. If I didn’t get more stuff, at least things wouldn’t get worst.

I suddenly realised: “This is me. I want this in my life. This is the lifestyle that I was looking for.”

(…) a lot of decluttering has been going on, and a lot of thought has been put into finding ways to live a more meaningful and intentional life. The results are starting to appear.

Find Your Inner Minimalist:

I think everyone has a minimalist inside them

I think in most of the cases, that minimalist inside you is just quiet, waiting for you to take action.

Minimalism is about living a more meaningful life, is about having the time to get to know you better, it’s about being healthier, exercising more, eating better, it’s about spending time with family and friends, it’s about having meaningful conversations, it’s about having a mission instead of a job, it’s about contributing, it’s about you and adding value to your life and the life of others.

Are You A Successful Woman?

(…) it also impressed on me that working is the most important thing and that without work (paid work) I would never feel accomplished as a woman. I don’t believe that anymore.

The way society ‘evolved’ makes us think that caregiving is far less important than breadwinning. How scary is that? Is taking care of your kids less important than making money and having a career?

Caregiving is hard work. Caregiving is the most meaningful work that we can do. It’s the best investment in our life, in our society, in our future. It’s investing in people.

Men are also under a lot of pressure, because if they want to be caregivers, society brands them as lesser men. Men are perceived as weak, weird and unambitious if they want to take time off work to spend with their kids.

I am a successful woman because I chose to invest my time in my girls, the most important thing in my life and I feel great to have made this choice.

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His

I – Intro:

This blog is to be a tool, an outlet of all that has been going on since my epiphany.

II – The Beginning:  The 30 minutes that changed my life.

The things we own consume our most precious commodity… TIME!!

It’s embarrassing to realise how much stuff we have and how little we really use or need.

The memories I have of you are from the experiences we shared, not the stuff you gave me.

III – Trying to Share:

(Year 0 a.k.a. 2016) It’s the year I embrace a new way of living, the year I leave my impulsive consumerist self behind and embrace a lifestyle more in line with truly, meaningfully living, not just tracking along current social concepts.

IV – Habits:

(…) if I were to take the practice of minimalism seriously I would have to adopt some new habits and implicitly let go of old ones. The main goal is to make the best use of my time.

V – Goals-The Marathon I:

Allow yourself to get lost, take unplanned turns and find new and exciting things along the way.

VI – Clutter:

If time is indeed money, than most of the things you own are getting into your pockets.

VII – Anchors I-Comfort:

(…) there is no other way to grow other than from a position of discomfort

VIII – Goals-The Marathon II:

Where do you see yourself in 1, 2, 5, 10 years? How would you have answered this question 1, 2, 5, 10 years ago?

IX – Anchors II-Money:

Yes, it is very possible to be debt-free and live a significant life’ – the key words here being FREE and SIGNIFICANT.

X – Minimalism-Definitions:

Replace your opinions with curiosity and take action. And no matter how you approach it, I have found this to be true: Deprivation does increase creativity and healthy habits do add value.

XI – Time:

Your priorities are the things that you actually spend your time doing.

XII – Anchors II-Status & Identity:

It’s easy to identify ourselves by our employment, but the truth is we are all much more than that.

XIII – Don’t Follow Your Passions:

I don’t believe we’re born with a predetermined vocation. I rather think we’re likely to become passionate about something only after we work on it repeatedly for a long period of time. We only arrive at a passion after we put in the long hours, conducting all the boring and unpleasant tasks associated with that curiosity/interest.

XIV – Expectations:

I expect to be able to expect nothing.

XV – Disappointment:

The next best thing to have no expectations is to turn disappointment into acceptance and embrace it.

XVI – Parents: Presents Vs Presence: 

Whatever it is we want to pass on to our kids can be introduced through example and availability.

XVII – Wishing the Time Away:

(…) wishing for the future to be here soon, will soon make it the present and if the present is made of wishing for the future… then one’s stuck in a vicious circle where the now does not exist.

XVIII – DIY:

What resources do we have, that can help us achieve the desired outcome?

XIX – Anchors IV-Relationships: 

We need relationships in our lives to feel and be better, more complete, to grow. Unfortunately, we have a tendency to choose convenient, nearby relationships because it requires a reduced amount of effort. We invest in relations based on ‘common interests’.

XX – Meditation:

Meditation has been helping me tackle stress and put my life into much needed perspective. It has brought me serenity; I am calmer and making clearer choices.

XXI – Our Lives 6.0:

We decided to start our conversations with “Here’s what we can do…”instead of Wouldn’t it be nice if we could…”

(…) only our perceived fears of potential loss of comfort were stopping us. Oh, the risks we don’t take in name of the reality we know.

XXII – Control:

(…) control is a product of our minds, with the sole function of appeasing our fears.

XXIII – Sitting In A Meeting:

They strive not to be the best they can be, but rather to prove that they are ‘less bad’ than the other and that their commitment is ‘not less’. I guess cooperation is on hold until the ‘market picks up’ again.

XXIV – And Here We Are:

I had a shameful thought, “We need a bigger place for our stuff”, that I instantly overcame by coming to the heart of the issue, “No, we just have too much stuff still”.

XXV – Prognostics:

Sometimes it feels like I won’t have enough time to do everything, but that’s not true. My life is an uncompetitive marathon, not a frenetic sprint.

XXVI – Weekend Away:

One of the most surprising things about this morning was that at 5am (still pitch black), there were already hundreds of people exercising along the boardwalk.(…) It’s an appealing lifestyle, built on a shared mindset and a mesmerising setting.

XXVII – WWW:

Not one single person asked me what prompted this change, the Why. I take this specific lack of curiosity as tacit confirmation that no one likes their jobs, or maybe they feel they’re being underpaid – Who doesn’t, hey?

XXVIII – Patience (Part 1):

I get the feeling that, generally, life is being lived way too fast with diminishing tolerance and acceptance. At a pace, so fast and self-centred, I believe to be harmful if one tries to keep up with. Should I slow down when everyone else seems to be sprinting? “Absolutely”. But won’t I be left behind? ”Well, all movement is relative!!”

XXIX – Living With the Enemy:

One needs only to start decluttering individually and the effects will soon become obvious to those most close to oneself. Granted, only if there is the need to change will change ever take place, but if there’s no need to change, then there’s no need for excuses.

XXX – ‘Unskypable’ Senses:

(…) every decision is a compromise and the choice to live in Australia bears the cost of not smelling Portugal – which is not a cost at all times.

XXXI – Job Hunt:

I made the deliberate choice to own my nerves ‘What’s the worst that can happen? I’ve heard ‘No’ before and am still here’.

XXXII – Time Perceptions:

Today, a year feels like a season and I wonder how long it will take for a year to feel like a month or a week.

(…) washing the dishes, cleaning the toilet, heading to work and changing diapers are indeed pleasant chores. They’re actually what I choose them to be – I get to label them.

XXXIII – Kicking Awareness:

All in all, life is very, very good and about to get even better!!

XXXIV – Time Gone By? That’s OK:

We became aware that ‘essential’ is in fact a lot less than we thought it was. That realisation is extremely liberating.

XXXV – Moving On:

Who am I to decide what my friend should or should not feel? He deserves the truth and to feel accordingly to the way he chooses to process it. Feelings are to be felt, not spared.

XXXVI – What’s the Plan?:

(…) come over, it’s nice here 😉

XXXVII – It’s a Boy:

(…) we still live in an extremely gender biased world.

XXXVIII – Autopilot:

We tend to let our minds race ahead whilst our “production” is achieved in autopilot.

XXXIX – Getting Political:

He didn’t win despite the fact he is a racist, egocentric, misogynist – he won because of it.

XL – A 1st Birthday:

Today I am more curious than excited or anxious. Today I put no emotional hopes on this job, nor any other “thing”. Today, I feel I’ve grown. Today, I feel I came a long way from where I have been.

XLI – A New Routine:

I know I will adapt, I always have, but I am still comparing and clinging to a recent reality that I took great comfort and pleasure in. But the fact is, that reality no longer is.

XLII – Life as a TV Show:

I am very grateful for the experiences in my past chapters. It’s amazing to think that all the decisions and actions in my life led me here.

Either performing minor or major roles, we are characters in the books being written around us.

XLIII – Preaching and Self-Labelling:

When exposing myself in a context that outlines personal growth (…), there is usually a defensive reaction because this intimate disclosure can be interpreted as an attack on the other.

XLIV – Happiness:

When it comes to our wellbeing, most of us tend to overvalue external circumstances and undervalue internal ones. We keep convincing ourselves that our happiness depends on a certain outcome, person or lifestyle. (…) We willingly and blindingly suffer from the I’ll-be-happy-when syndrome.

(…) happiness becomes a biproduct of choosing to live more meaningfully. A biproduct of choosing to live in accordance with our values.

If my happiness is dependent on something that I do not have, then I can never be happy here and now. And this is the only time I can be happy because this is the only time I do have. Not yesterday, not tomorrow. How can I have time in a place that does not exist?

XLV – Quitting Facebook:

I strongly believe that the main foundation (or even sole) for creating and living an online life” is ego.

Our own insecurities and covetous jealousy still hold the online life of others as an object of curiosity and scrutiny.

XLVI – Best Of “Year 0”:

What have you been up to?

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